We usually hear that martial arts are designed to develop a selfless person - one who exists to serve his or her art, community, or some purpose larger than him or herself. This is certainly true, but sometimes the proper focus in training is on yourself.
At times when things don't go exactly the way you'd like, focus on yourself rather than on the person who may have caused your dissatisfaction. Instead of thinking, "he didn't attack me the way he was supposed to," it is more productive to think, "how could my response have been more effective?" That way, you are constantly improving your martial arts skills, making you a better practitioner, a better demonstrator, a better competitor, or better at self-defense.
Our philosophy is that every action is an expression of the inner person. If we want to be great martial artists, we can get better by always focusing on the improvements we can make in ourselves, rather than on the perceived shortcomings of others.
This is true outside the dojo, as well. Physical beauty fades, money is external, strength diminishes over time. Beauty of the spirit, however, always shines through. When you face a challenge, ask yourself, "how would the person I want to be respond to this?" If someone irritates you, remember that it is you who is irritated, not necessarily the other person who is irritating. Instead of lashing out, respond the way a secure, kind person would respond. If you do so often enough, you will become that person.
JMAC would like to thank the many Ann Arbor businesses that support this blog, both martial arts-related and others, including: Network Services Group, Art of Japanese Swordsmanship, Shudokan Martial Arts Association, Budo Mind and Body, Art of Judo, Iaido Dot Com, Lorandos and Associates, Oxford Companies, Bluestone Realty Advisors, Portfolio Ann Arbor, Invest Ann Arbor, the Law Office of Nicklaus Suino and the ITAMA Dojo.
6 comments:
Do not lay blame. It is not constructive. Instead, strive to find a way to solve the problem at hand, or work through the situation without letting your ego get in your way.
If you are always trying to overcome challenges instead of trying to find a scapegoat for why they exist, you will grow internally stronger, and make the world a better place at the same time.
If you go for a walk and encounter an obstacle in your path, you quite naturally look for a way around the obstacle, not through it. Similarly, in training and in life, when you find yourself having difficulties relating to someone or something else, it is much better to look at what you can do to resolve the situation, not how you can force the other party to change.
Taking responsibility for your own action and reactions, rather than worrying about the actions of others, will lead to the most progress and effectiveness in your endeavors.
Accept things as they are and work on your reaction to what is, not what you would like or think things should be. When in class don’t focus on how well or not well you fellow students are doing, instead focus on your own training if you truly wish to improve.
Focus on personal success through self actualization and awareness (both physical and emotional)instead of getting caught up in the pitfalls of the insecure mind, such as petty conflicts and blame shifting.
"This is true outside the dojo, as well..." and practical: Imagine the gained productivity of a group of individuals working to better the whole by improving individually through self-actualization rather than wasting time and energy with politics and squabbling; add a common mission and you have a recipe for success!
I believe it can be highly constructive not only to concentrate on improving oneself, but also to learn how to adapt to others, no matter what their shortcomings are. In real life, you aren't likely to be attacked by the people you're used to working with. It's more likely you're going to be attacked by someone you don't know and whose style you've never encountered. So it's valuable to learn how to deal with differences in others.
We should all listen to criticism that we receive. It's usually a consistent these. So if you're hearing something constructive, especially if it's repeated by multiple persons, take a look in the mirror and try to modify your behavior. It's a great tool for growing as an individual and a martial artist.
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